Jon Richardson: A Little Bit OCD, produced by Open Mike for Channel 4 in 2013, was shortlisted and subsequently won a Mind Media Award which the charity Mind hosts every year.
In it’s category were four other outstanding documentaries . Open Mike were very proud to win and are quoted as saying that it was the sharing very brave stories of those living with OCD that made it such a great documentary.
Congratulations to all involved.
"A little bit OCD" When I knew my boy was haunted by this demon in his ear Not knowing how to help him, My knowledge turned to fear. I'll keep this to myself I thought, He didn't want to be the boy that was a weirdo, Just 'That kid with OCD .' But people came to notice little signs that served to tell. They all became an expert "I've got OCD as well!" "I always put my books in line so neatly on the shelf. My husband says that I'm a little bit OCD myself!" "Take away his Xbox if he keeps on being late. Ground him for a week and he'll soon Realise his mistake." "Tell him to snap out of it. You have to make him see. Nip it in the bud, we're all a wee bit OCD." My boy can not eat or sleep or concentrate at school. A little bit OCD maybe But at least he's not a fool! Jane Drew
In John’s early teens when he and I suspected OCD and the rest of the world were either oblivious or in denial, John tried to combat the condition himself (without the stigma of having a label slapped on him by the medical profession)
For my part I hoped that if we ignored it, it would go away. Perhaps he would grow out of it? I wondered if acknowledging it’s existence might somehow justify the rituals and discourage John from trying to suppress them. I wonder still if time alone with OCD allows the sufferer to indulge what should be resisted. We were both naive, however, and underestimated the OCD grip!
The rituals and compulsions multiplied and became more severe with time. The realisation that this was not going to go away hung like a black cloud.
Now, years on in the midst of the battle I am still regularly fooled into thinking that all is well. Each time John has a few ‘good’ days (not to say that he is ever OCD free, but sometimes in good spirits, functioning well, sleeping, eating with only moderate compulsions), I am euphoric and find myself acting as if he is well. Perhaps he is cured? Perhaps it was all a dream and he never had it at all?! I fall for it every time!
When the meltdown comes it devastates me anew.
I relive the heartbreaking realisation that my son is not perfect. That life will probably always be hard for him, but you know what?….
…….I am proud of him, at 16 he is already his own man despite his difficulties, he is perfect !
Ranked in the top 10 most debilitating illnesses by the World Health Organisation.
More than 741,504 sufferers
Linked with suicide, depression, lost income and broken relationships.
Look again!
It’s no joke!
The horror of discovering that my boy had OCD made me frantic to understand it. Know thine enemy.
As time has passed I have had to come to terms with the knowledge that I never really will. It is a changing beast that is not only individual to the person, but it morphs and evolves.
We have to try to understand up to a point. Then we reach the edge of the cliff looking out into a darkness through which we cannot pass, and we know our child is out there alone.
Speaking for myself as a parent of a teen with OCD, I think that the worst thing is the fear of what lies in store for him.
I imagine a string of failed relationships and lost jobs, and at best a lonely old age.
When I realised the severity of John’s OCD I desperately researched the condition. Hours of trawling the web and thumbing through OCD charity magazines did nothing to abate my fears. I read inspirational and heart rending stories of noble and broken parents swimming, walking or climbing to raise money in memory of their child lost to OCD. I encountered more and more horror stories of suicide, drug addiction and alcoholism/liver damage cutting short the lives of young adults as they struggled and failed to survive their OCD. I cannot describe the hollow feeling as the realization hit me that if we did not find help and fast,the prognosis could be fatal.
This is why I am passionate about seeing a change in the speed in which youngsters are treated, the quality of their care and the way in which the education system treats them.
I am hopeful for John now as he begins his ERP therapy, but I will never forget that feeling and am very aware that other parents out there are also fearing and fighting for the future.
Educate the Educators Our experience of endeavouring to give the school system a basic understanding of OCD has been very frustrating. Johns last year at school caused him such anxiety that panic attacks on days when he had tutors who were particularly obtuse to his situation meant that his attendance fell considerably. Teachers noticed something was wrong when the quiet, helpful boy became argumentative and difficult. One teacher told me she could hardly believe it was the same boy. At first I did not realise this was connected to John's OCD, which he tried to conceal and I thought consisted of just a few odd habits at that time. His grades began to slip. When it became obvious that his condition had worsened the penny dropped.He was arguing with teachers because he could not tell them why he did not want to move seat, why he could not pick up his pen, why he kept looking over his shoulder, why he refused to remove his jacket. He was frequently late due to lack of sleep and lengthy rituals. A dislike of pencil cases for hygiene reasons meant that he often lacked the necessary equipment and vast amounts of time were spent in detention or internal exclusion. The injustice made him angry. For My first meeting with his head of year I armed myself with a short printout from the OCD international web site which briefly explained the condition. I included some links in case further information was needed and I typed out a short summery of how Johns particular compulsions might affect school life. Sympathetic noises were made and I was assured that a memo would be circulated among staff and the required allowances made. I was also assured complete confidentiality in respect to his peers. Three days later John was put in internal exclusion for being low level disruptive. In class he had asked to leave the room to wash his hands. The teacher refused his request and told him to get on with his work. John became agitated. He could not pick up his pen until he had washed his hand. He argued his point, unable to mention OCD in front of his classmates and the teacher shouted at him to do his work.The situation escalated and he was punished. This time I met with the deputy head. Was the memo not circulated or were staff ignoring it? I furnished him with all the information given to his colleague and waited for the explanation. "If john could not pick up his pen in that lesson, how was he able to use the computer in the next one?" I could have cried. I was wasting my breath. I appreciate it is a difficult condition to understand as it is different for everyone, but the tone was that he suspected that John was a liar. A catalogue of disasters followed. Johns coat was confiscated causing him so much distress he had to be sent home. He was sent to the office for a pen, was challenged about why he was not in class and ended up surrounded by five staff members shouting at him in a corridor with a girlfriend looking on. He asked to speak with a staff member who knew about his condition and was refused permission. Again he became so distressed he had to be sent home. The icing on the cake came when a teacher burst into his class and announced loudly to another tutor that John had asked her not to lose her temper with him as he had OCD! Now his classmates knew. So much for confidentiality! In conclusion, despite numerous meetings with teachers , lack of understanding and an unwillingness to take the condition seriously prevailed. They tried to make politically correct noises but remained largely unhelpful. I can't help thinking that had John's disability been visual he would have been presented with all kinds of aids to help him. As it is he had to struggle alone against the tide. It is too late for him now. His school days are behind him, but if schools could be educated to understand the disorder, life might be easier for the next child with OCD that passes through their gates. Post script; I just read this list designed to help teachers to recognize when a child has OCD. I cried. It is describing John precisely. http://school.ocdaction.org.uk/teachers/ No one believed him. No one helped him. I can't help but wonder if his disability had been of a visual nature, if staff would have dared to ignore it.
John’s dark days
